Autism is a disorder of neural development characterized by impaired social interaction and communication, and by restricted and repetitive behavior. Maggie had a moment tonight that reminded me of a 2 year old Maggie. She used to take a group of 3 and sort them by tossing them into piles of 3 objects such as blocks or shoes. Always 3 and I would mess with her to see if she noticed by placing a 4th item into her group. She ALWAYS noticed and would remove it or another one of the objects to maintain her group of 3 at any given point. Maggie can be extremely Obsessive, is the polite way of saying it, but in actuality if it's not the way she wants it - she freaks out! It's quite simple so I try really hard to make sure things are the right number, color, smell, sound as to not set her off.

This evening she was desperately trying to sign something to me and I have figured out when she wants something but does not know the sign she takes both hands and waves them like she wants to fly. I eventually made out she wanted a drink. Which I got for her but as soon as I gave it to her she was signing again and pointing to the bookcase. I looked up and saw on the very top (10ft) her chewy. I took it down and she began to laugh almost cry - I understood her and that was wonderful! She took the chewy and went off and I noticed she had a group of chewy devices that she was sorting through and testing. She had piles and was mouthing each one of them.

Sometimes that Repetitive aspect is forgotten in some children, they outgrow it or become more controlled in social environments. Maggie is a creature of repetitive habit. It was one of the initial indicators something was not as it should be. She would become so fixated that if I touched her or disturbed her in any way it would result in a meltdown.

Sometimes a diagnosis brings a sense of relief. Sometimes it brings a sense of panic and uncertainty. I had mixed feelings. The more I read, the more I knew, the more I felt I could advocate and help my child. Yet in the same breath I feel more overwhelmed and intimidated by what the future holds.

And to be completely honest... I love the evening when Maggie is asleep and I have an hour or 2 of silence and am able to put some perspective on the day and the events or lack there of. And most importantly I need sleep and Myk time - I am a more patient mother when I have some perspective and breaks. I am so excited for this week! Maggie gets to start one of her most favorite activities on monday!!! I will post pictures :) I hope everyone had a wonderfully relaxing weekend!

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