What Makes Maggie..... Maggie!

Yesterday I was approach by a mom, who I see at church but I don't really know her, and she asked me this "What Is It That Makes Your Child Special?" I thought to myself, self ...that is the best, kindest, most lovely way anyone has asked about my child's difficulties. She genuinely thought my child was sweet, delightful and beautiful. She went on to say that she has a brother with down syndrome and how challenging it has been for their family. She just listened while I gave a short, non-detailed version of her diagnoses. She didn't feel sorry for me or Maggie. She didn't express pity. She didn't sigh heavily or say a lot of 'OOHHHH' She never gave a backhanded insult. And although I have had this type of encounter hundreds of times - I think this was my favorite and most uplifting because it got me thinking about what truly makes Maggie, Maggie.

On a medical form Maggie has dozens of problems and numbers and dates covering the page making any sane individual feel overwhelmed and possibly heart broken that such a young person has been through so much and has years to come of challenges.

On an IEP, Maggie is difficult, challenging, requires constant attention and multiple steps for adaptive procedures. She is behind in every thing she has been tested in. Her file is inches thick and she has never visited the principals office!

But like every standardized test - it is not a complete picture of the individual!

When I think about what makes Maggie, Maggie, I think about her Laugh - she has a full belly giggle, her whole body and every fiber of her being laughing, makes you have to laugh with her! She has the kind of laugh that just makes your whole world a little better. I love that she calms down and will get excited and dances to the song "Billionaire" - by Glee and she loves falling asleep to "Home" - by Michael Buble. We joke that she is a supermodel, but now I think she's an Italian supermodel - she doesn't like eating dinner but she will drink a whole bottle of Pelligrino, Italian sparkling water for a meal. She adores her uncles! And they adore her - they really are amazing with her. She loves bouncing on the trampoline! She is a football fanatic! She will will watch every game on Saturday and Sunday! She signs 'Touchdown' , 'Offsides' and 'False Start' - Correctly too! She could be a referee or a cheerleader someday - either way she gets to be near the action which is her favorite! She gives the best hugs! On the weekends she will wake up and play quietly until she is hungry and then will gentle touch my face to wake me up - (I sometimes pretend I'm still sleeping to see how long she will be patient and last weekend she tried 3 times to be gentle when waking me up - I hope she's imitating me and trying to be a loving, gentle waker upper)

I could go on and on...

She is wonderful, smart, beautiful, clever, feisty, sweet, unique, and above all My Daughter!

10 Things being the mother of a Special Needs Child has taught me

What's so different about parenting a special needs child anyways??? As parents we all grow and learn and become stronger more amazing people because of our children and the love we bear for them. But I think the difference is that with any child, parents guide and mold who they become. With special needs children - as parents we must be ready and willing to be taught...

1. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me patience with everything is a must. A quality that at times can be taken for granted with a healthy child…

2. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me I do have courage to face anything. It’s okay that sometimes I need to cry, to walk away just so I can breathe for a moment. And then I am back stronger than ever…

3. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me to be understanding of those less fortunate, or different from you, never be quick to judge...

4. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me that while yes, there are many moments of struggles those single moments of accomplishment are so much sweeter...

5. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me that I do know what is best for my child. Even if I have to fight the school, the doctor, other parents, the insurance company, friends, politicians…

6. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me that hope, even the smallest glimmer of hope can be enough to get you through the day…

7. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me that the world is exciting, beautiful and that even the smallest of things is new and wonderful. To see life through a child's eyes is special, but through a special needs child's eyes is magical...

8. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me unconditional love which I know comes from the fact that I was chosen by Heavenly Father to be blessed with this beautiful child, for many may never know such a blessing and I can’t imagine my life without her…

9. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me that I am stronger than I thought I could be. That I am a neurologist, a nurse, a professional fundraiser, a housekeeper, a manager, a special educator, a researcher and an advocate all bundled up into the mother you can all plainly see…

10. Being the mother of a special needs child has taught me the greatest lesson in my life. I may be many things in the eyes of others but here at home I am the mother of a special needs child and this child loves me unconditionally and teaches me so much…that is what defines me, what makes me whole and loving and open to the infinite possibilities of the world…

Exercise

I am a little too ADD for a treadmill. I get distracted, which leads to becoming clumpsey, and that could result in injury... Overall I prefer alternative forms of exercise and recently have found a number of options I really enjoy. I love hiking but taking Maggie is challenging to be polite so that's a solo gig. ZUMBA - Oh boy, I have become a trendy work out girl and the shaky shaky - that's a Myk only though. We love swimming but that requires going to the gym at specific times because it's Minnesota, nobody has a pool, unlike Arizona where we always had a pool... And It's so beautiful here I want to be outside all the time! Solution for all ages - Trampoline! Holy Jumping Batman! Everyone loves this baby! No cords or technology required even. It's a fabulous thing when Andy's friend's are leaving their house, where they have a Wii and coming to our house to bounce!

Saturday afternoon Andy and his friend Trevor bounced for hours which was nice but then they let Maggie join them and that was heaven! She loves bouncing and she laughs and gets a great workout!
But on a side note- I love that Andy has been such a great advocate for Maggie. He always tells his friends about her, how to act around her, what not to do, why she doesn't talk. And he always does this in a non demeaning and kind way. Trevor is a good friend too, he knows Andy cares for Maggie so he is nice and will be friendly to her too! I love that he has such wonderful friends! I hope it sets an example for Maggie but if anything she has fantastic older boys who will protect her from anything! That's not a bad gig.
I think the little girl was wearing out the boys!